If you’ve just lost to your brother in a fight that involved you both dressing in Ned Kelly armor made from barrels and swatting each other with absurdly large weapons, do you honorably admit defeat and step away… or do you escalate things by fabricating a comically large sword, strapping it to the arm of a construction excavator, and driving up to his doorstep to demand a rematch?
Such was the dilemma facing Hong Kong-based YouTube maniac Handy Geng. Geng specializes in constructing, let’s say, idiosyncratic machines. Some of his more memorable recent projects include “Handmade Revolver Lithium Drill” (a power drill built to look like the sort of hand-cannon that’d put Marty Robbins to shame) and “Homemade Alpaca Sausage Grill Machine” (exactly what it sounds like). So there was only ever really going to be one outcome here, and happily for those of us who enjoy watching people build very silly machines, he chose… violence.
The result, inspired by the sword wielded by a character in the manga Bleach, is one of the most impressively deranged things we’ve seen on the internet for quite some time—and we’ve seen some pretty ridiculous things of late. (Come to think of it, Handy Geng would have fit right in with the good folk at Survival Research Laboratories.) I mean, the blade must be a good 15 feet long:
It’s fitted to the excavator arm by way of a custom-fabricated sheet metal fist, which is honestly a really impressive piece of work, not least because it also includes a speaker for blasting “intimidating music.” Geng is clearly very proud of the finished product, cackling happily as he slices and dices his way through a succession of unfortunate objects—he starts, inexplicably, with a watermelon (“It sliced very well!”), before progressing to two water barrels, a couple of derelict cars, and finally his unsuspecting brother’s three-wheeled rickshaw-type vehicle.
The brother in question is, understandably, nonplussed by the appearance of a 10-ton death machine on his doorstep. “Isn’t this basically cheating?” he asks—which, y’know, fair point. Geng, of course, has no time for such quibbling, and the video closes with brother and excavator locked in mortal combat. Who will prevail? Watch this space!
(We should add that this is all good-natured fun, and that you should absolutely not try things like “unleashing a gigantic and potentially lethal weapon upon my unsuspecting brother” at home. No matter how much he pisses you off.)
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